Having a baby for the first time can be quite scary for new parents. The challenges that this will bring to any new family can either delight or frighten even the toughest of people. Having a newborn baby does not need to be as terrifying as one may think, so long as you are prepared in more ways than one. No, I am not talking about the material items you will need to buy for your newborn baby such as nappies or a baby car seat; I am talking about the other stuff parents don’t talk about......... how to prepare YOU.

For instance it might be daunting that you will have a new person in the house. Maybe your family has gone from being just the two of you, to being the three of you. You may have enjoyed being a solo couple- a perfect sized group and now you are having a baby that will come and invade your space. No more going out to dinner when you want too or to a friend’s party or even staying up late to watch TV, even private time with your partner will now be compromised by baby sabotage!

There is also the reality of not knowing what to really expect when having a baby. Parents can no longer set out a plan of HOW to bring up their baby. How many times have you heard a parent say “My baby will sleep all night” or “My child will never be like that!” well I am afraid to tell all expectant parents that babies do not come pre programmed to suit your requirements, they actually have a mind of their own and if they do not want to sleep through the night.........they won't! I can guarantee you that they will scream and cry and they WILL keep you up all night if they want too and unless you have a heart made from stone, more than likely you will cave in to your baby’s wants.

Sadly, babies do not come with “Everything you need is included” stamped on their forehead. So as a new mum being prepared as best that you can be is important. Now, you may talk to other parents about parenting but BEWARE, some parents find the fact that you’re a new mum to be a dumping ground to tell you how to raise your baby and what to expect at childbirth. The last thing you need is for someone to explain in GREAT detail the birth of their child. Listening to something like this could turn anyone off having children.

Not all stories that people tell you about giving birth or having a baby is all that bad. In fact with my first child, I learnt more from my family and friends than I did from my own doctor. However, you do need to be critical on what to listen to when you are targeted as a rubbish tip!

Here are a few tips to having a baby:

-Focus on the positives more than the negatives Don’t get wrapped up in the constant crying so easily, this is the only way a baby can communicate with you and if you paid attention to yourself, you would find that you smile more at your baby during the day than however many times you stress over the crying and lack of sleep.

-People’s opinions are different No matter what anyone tells you, you will not experience having a baby like anyone else in the world. No one can ever prepare you for what is about to happen, you need to experience it for yourself and this includes raising your child as well.

-Be prepared to learn You will get it wrong along the way, but that is what parenting is all about. Babies have an uncanny knack of telling you what they want and need, so do pay attention they will teach you a thing or two don’t think that only you are the teacher in the family.

-Don’t over think everything A stressed mother can be dangerous to your health and baby’s. Relax as much as you can. If baby is crying, don’t think that he or she is out to get you! Place baby in the crib and walk out of the room for a minute or two. Settle yourself down before tending to baby is the key. Count to ten also helps. Remember having a baby is a wonderful thing.

-Make time for you Remember baby will fit into your life not the other way around. Rely on your family support they will gladly give you a break when you need one. Make time for your partner (I still go on dates with my partner). Do something you really enjoy at least once a week like a hobby or sport. Don’t believe that your life as you know it has come to an end because it hasn’t, in fact having a baby opens a new life full of new people that you will meet in the years to come at childcare, school and sporting events to name a few.

-Enjoy your baby You cannot stamp “Return to Sender” on your baby once it is here. You created your baby, you’re baby is a treasure, so most of all remember to ENJOY YOUR BABY!

Mother of two, Suzie is an administration manager by profession working in business and education. For more parenting articles and information on help with children, have a look at Suzie's website Diaries of an Obsessed Mother