“ Hi, How are you?” said John with a friendly grin on his face. Sandy replied “I’m good” slightly hesitating because she knows she is feeling terrible today. Sometimes people who are going through bumps in their lives are the best at covering up the truth. They learn very quickly how to put up a wall, or front as if everything is peaches and cream.

I couldn’t help but to think of all the people in the world who are trying to conquer the storms in their lifes today. I’m in Virginia Beach preparing for what everyone is calling a Super Storm, Hurricane Irene! There have been warnings of Hurricane Irene coming to the east coast for the past four days.

In the past four days people were out preparing for the Storm buying up all the canned food from the grocery stores, buying batteries and following all the correct procedures for when a massive storm heads towards your state. I want to discuss briefly what we can do to help others when we realize a friend of a family member is going through a storm in their life.

Listen and Pay Attention

In troubled times, it is very hard for most people to open up and discuss issues that may be bothering them. I use to buy foreclosed homes for a period of time in the Virginia Beach area. I would always be amazed how homeowners would contact me to try to help them out of a sticky situation. Bad things do happen to good people, most times they had lost their job and had gone through their savings in a period of six months.

I would estimate that about ninety percent of the homeowners who were weeks away from losing their home had seldom told their family or friends. Imagine the stress, the heartache or the pure disappointment the homeowner might feel. The homeowner would actually be embarrassed and feel shame because of their unfortunate situation.

Most times I found myself just listening to whatever they had to say. “Let it out” I would say, as they felt more comfortable, I would get more details of their story. The point I want to be clear about is, these homeowners had friends, friends and family help each other in bad times.

Intimate conversations are healthy, Intimate conversations can let someone get something off their chest that they might be holding in. I learned a long time ago to stop and listen to my friends and to pay attention to what they do. A simple “Hey man, is everything o.k., you seem to be a little on edge, Is there anything you want to talk about? “ is perfect.

It confirms the idea to your friend or family member that you truly care about their feelings or situation. You never know if a friend is experiencing a hurricane Irene in their life, so listen, you might be able to help.

Pay attention to the little things your friends or family members might be doing. If a friend suddenly starts giving away valuable personal items, this could be a sign. Some depressed individuals when they are very close to committing suicide will gift over items that they cherish. Your ability to suggest professional help to a close friend might be the boost they need to save their life.

Being a friend is a two way street so in the next couple of days, contact your loved ones and have a intimate conversation with them. Listening and paying attention to family and friends will not only strengthen your relationship but it will enhance the bond you have with them.

Sometimes a positive encounter can just the boost a family of friend needs who is experiencing a hurricane Irene in their life.