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The Greek/european Crisis Analyzed By A Typical Corrupted Greek
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The Greek/european Crisis Analyzed By A Typical Corrupted Greek

Dear foreigner,

what I’ m about to do here is, incontrovertibly (Πωωωω, το χω ο άτιμος) a miracle, as I haven’t spoken or written in English since I was, ehmm, since a long time ago. My goal is to make you understand how desperately I need your money. I need them! I want them all, in order to donate them to the Banks, so I can save them from collapsing, thus they can keep lending more expensive money to the countries, so as to ensure they (the countries) won’t default, putting banks in a terrible position.

Are you so ignorant? I’ m talking to you my fellow German, Austrian, Dutch, Finnish, and whosoever managed to post primary budget surpluses. I’ m talking to you, the one who worked so hard, and paid so much taxes, so as to become strong enough to live an insouciant life. Well, to be completely honest, you cannot do that! It’s against the basic principals of neoliberalism. Don’t be deceived by my life style. I’ m Greek! I can bend the rules! I live much longer than you, despite the fact I’m a world champion in smoking. I pay much less taxes than you, even though I have a much more hostile tax system. I have a free health care and education system, but I pay much more in health care and education (fakelaki and frontistirio) than you. I work so much more than you (yes, it’s a eurostat fact), but I’ m hanging out until the next morning. I have the most corrupted politicians in the whole oecd world, but I keep voting for them, because in the end, what’s the point of voting for someone honest and respectable (boring!). I have the most unproductive and ineffective public sector, among the members of the eurozone, but I’m still trying to become a public servant, because….Well, because I’ m Greek. I can do all that incredible things.

I know, some of them are a bit unfair, but what’s fair in life? Is it fair that your country uses nuclear energy putting as all in danger? Is it fair that your country never compensated as for the World War 2 crimes? (Ok, that was a hit below the belt. I take it back.) Is it fair that your country’s biggest corporations corroded and the last decent government officer, in order to achieve illegitimate high prices for their products or/and services, that forced me to look for money in the financial markets? Is it fair that despite the fact we are the last frontier of Europe, we were left alone to deal with the immigration problem? Another unaffordable, for a country like mine, burden. The catalog is endless.

The thing is, what are we going to do now? Are we responsible enough to leave all that behind and become real European citizens? Do we want to achieve a real political unification of Europe? A Europe of justice, humanism and democracy, or do we want a Europe of stereotypes, xenophobia and ethnocentrism? (Yes, that’s all Greek words). Well, I’m ready to move forward, because I want to be the change I want to see in the world. Are, you?


Street Talk

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