This Article is About
long term relationship
honeymoon stage
rest of my life
groceries
nine months
sparks
hassle
stranger
laundry
interaction
tragedy
couch
Are You Ready To Commit
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Commitment. How can a person tell if he or she is ready to share him or herself with someone else? How can we say that we are ready to share our life with some stranger and be ready to face what is about to change. Commitment is an interaction dominated by obligations. These obligations maybe self-imposed, mutual or may even be explicitly stated.

I am only 25 and most may say I'm not old enough to speak for this topic however I find an interest to write about what I have experienced in the past. Three years ago, after my long-term relationship, I've met a guy whom I thought I could share my life with for the rest of my life. I was willing to give everything I could offer for our relationship to work. Well, at least that's how confident I was of saying that I am ready for a serious commitment once again. Of course, like any other relationship, the honeymoon stage was the best. We practically lived together. I was working, unfortunately he was not, but because my eyes are mystified with sparks of love, him being unemployed was not a hassle - at first.

Ideally, a couple's mise en scene is like, the man goes out everyday at work, while the woman stays at home doing the laundry, cleaning the house, cooking and everything else. So when the man gets back home, he will be greeted with a kiss and a hug, rests at the couch for some time and then he is served with a nice cooked meal by the woman. In my story, it was the other way around, minus the kiss-and-a-hug, the nice cooked meal and everything else. I was always greeted with a house without anyone, a kitchen with no food or even groceries. This kind of scenario was my life for nine months. Predicaments arose, monetary matters became an issue plus all the other women, wearing nothing but a towel, who would knock at the door looking for my man, or at least I thought was mine and mine alone. I didn't give up that easily rather I fought hard to save what I thought was worthy to save. Few more months and a tragedy blew off my mind. the sparks in my eyes began to shatter, though it did make me see things clearer. It made me understood and realized a lot of things. The next day I packed my things, went home and stopped seeing this man.

I have come to realize that love is not enough to sustain a relationship. It needs trust, respect and honesty. Love will never be the only reason to say you are ready for a commitment, because most, if not every time, the love we see is just an affection towards someone. The feeling we thought was love is just an excitement when our life starts to get boring and needs some spark.

So here are some realizations that might help you readers to think through:

1. Love yourself. We have heard this from other people, I know, but when a person is astound by a magical spark, he/she tends to forget who he/she really is. You know yourself better than anyone else. You set your own principle and you are the only one allowed to make or break them. You will never know how ready you are in any kind of commitment unless you know your limitations.

2. Set your rules. Some do not believe in setting the rules anymore because they say rules don't work. I dare say, rules work, so long as you remember they aren't made to be broken. Rules will not limit you in doing what you want but it will always remind you why you have them in the first place.

3. Happiness. Happiness is not achieved just by having someone else in your life, remember that happiness is develop in one's self. It just needs some factors to make it grow, but when you lack one, doesn't mean you will never achieved it anymore. You are your own happiness, it is just up to you how to make it work.

4. If things don't work out the way you want them to be, you can always turn to someone for help. He is always there, watching you in every step of the way. Don't be ambiguous to see the silver lining.

In becoming prepared for a commitment there is pain that comes along with it. So one must also be ready to hurt and be hurt. Relationships doesn't work one way but both. It also needs pain for you to remember that you have not just prepared yourself for love. If things work out the way you want them to be, be glad, if otherwise, be ready for it. Remember that in this world we live in, nothing is endless.


Street Talk

Thanks for the awesome article...I agree that love is not enough to keep the relationship alive. Thanks Johanna.

Reply
  about 1 decade ago

Hi Connie! I forgot my account details in this account of mine, Thanks for the comment. :)

Reply
  about 1 decade ago
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