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doing the same old thing
different perspective
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Can You Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back By Moving On - Yes!
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Can You Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back By Moving On  -  Yes!

Did you fight your breakup tooth and nail, but only ended up sore and dejected? Is your ex-boyfriend apparently made of stone, and he's not wavering in his decision to end the relationship? Did you offer to promise him anything he wanted as long as he would give you the chance to be with him? What other tactics did you try? You probably missed the one option that actually gives you a shot to get back together. It's not one that often comes to mind, but it's extremely effective - if you commit to giving it a try and sticking to your guns, regardless.

It's safe to say (but difficult to admit) that you've been going about things the wrong way. You may have the right idea or the right intentions - but your actions are simply treading water. They're not making any real progress - and that why your breakup is continuing. In order to turn things around, some basic things need to change. First and foremost, the balance of power has to at least be restored - if not tipped in the opposite direction towards you. Instead of just succumbing and going by whatever your ex-boyfriend decides, take control of your own life. It may have a result that you didn't accept, but you'll certainly see results.

Secondly, you need to be willing to take things to a whole new level and approach it from a different perspective. You can't simply keep on doing the same old thing and expect a different result. Face it, your attempts have come up short, and you now recognize why. You need to do something completely unexpected, and that means doing something that you didn't see coming either. If you want the chance to reconnect with your ex-boyfriend, you need to be willing to let him go. As hard as it may be to put into practice, you need to start moving on.

Your ex-boyfriend pulled your security out from under you but is trying to hold onto you for his. It's blatantly unfair, and chances are good that you do not enjoy being used as a security blanket - no one does. Not only does he not have to give you a play-by-play of where he is, who he's with and what he's doing, he doesn't have to worry about being alone - not really. If he can't find any new dating prospects, he believes that he can always go back to you if necessary. That means he has the freedom to explore the world and all that it has to offer - while keeping you in his back pocket in case of emergencies.

Chances are good that being an emergency plan in case something new doesn't come along in a pre-established time frame does not fit into your overall life-plan. No one can blame you for taking the consideration personally, although it's doubtful that your ex-boyfriend is intentionally trying to be hurtful. He may not even understand the reasons behind his actions; it's a part of the subconscious that helps dictate behavior. Like it or not, however, that is the reality of the way your ex is viewing you and the situation overall. Changing his perception of you isn't as simple as just wishing it to happen - you have to take steps to make it happen - and the most effective way to do that is to act in a way that is outside of his expectations, and that means you need to start the process of moving on - and getting on with your own life.

While a guy's ego may seem massive and overwhelming, it is often very fragile as well. It doesn't take much to burst that bubble. Believe it or not, it can be as easy as simply getting out of the house and having fun again. You reaffirmed his belief that your world was wrapped up in your relationship by the way you acted when it first came to an end. You were miserable and you possibly begged him to take you back again. That encouraged his beliefs about you and made him feel invincible. When you step away from that stigma, however, things drastically change.

The more confident you become, the less confident he is. He starts to examine how he'd feel if you moved on without him, and the reality of not having you around in case he changes his mind is going to start creeping in. All of a sudden, the situation has done an abrupt about face. Now the power rests with you, and that's going to put him on-edge and force him into action - even though seeing someone new is the absolute last thing on your mind.

The last thing you want to do is go find another guy to mess with just to make that jealousy more pronounced. Trying to encourage jealousy on the part of your ex-boyfriend is dangerous territory, and it's completely unnecessary. Additionally, you don't want to simply use someone else to get back at your ex - that puts them in the same position you were in, and you remember how badly that feels.

The simple beauty of moving on is that you don't have to make any grand gestures or come up with embarrassing schemes to get the result you're looking for. You're simply trying to enhance your life and embrace your new reality while your ex-boyfriend starts doubting and questioning himself. You don't have to do anything except go after what's truly best for you, and that's what's really important.

Your Next Steps

Your behaviour right now is crucial if you want to reunite with him. First of all, you need to learn some expert get him back techniques to increase your chances substantially. You should also be looking into whether or not he still has feelings for you. There are signs he still loves you even if he is being tight-lipped and non-committal.

Using Facebook strategies to make him chase you and want you again is also a brilliant way of getting him interested again.


Street Talk

Great advice!

Reply
  about 7 years ago

i like your article Chariotte

Reply
  about 7 years ago
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