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It's natural to want to get your relationship back after your ex unceremoniously dumps you. In fact, it's often the first instinct that people turn to when they're faced with a difficult and seemingly impossible situation that seems to be outside of your control completely. One of the biggest advantages you have in your corner can be learning to read the signs your ex is giving off. Don't look for the obvious. They won't be flashing neon arrows pointing you in the right direction. If you really want to get your ex back, you'll need to learn to dig a little further beneath the surface. Their signs will be subtle and outside the normal realm that you're used to seeing - but if your ex still has romantic feelings towards you, the signs will be there - and they will be hard to ignore once you recognize them and learn what they are.
Almost every breakup in the world can be reversed, but it's not an easy process to pull off. It's hard to know where to begin, but your best bet is to learn to read between the lines and recognize your ex's signals and signs correctly. If they're harboring feelings for you, they're either unaware that they still exist or, more likely, they've buried them deep inside - and they're no longer in touch with their own emotions. Recognizing these signals can be harder than any act towards rebuilding your relationship, but the end result is a renewed, rebuilt relationship that is stronger than you could have ever imagined - if you have the patience and the fortitude to see it through to its completion.
These five signs are not the only signs that your ex may be displaying in their dealings with you - but they are often the easiest to recognize, as long as you know what you're looking for in advance.
- They've Kept In Touch Consistently
If your ex initiated the standard no-contact policy immediately following the breakup, they seem to have abruptly changed their mind. They seem interested in nothing more than continuing to talk to you like the breakup never happened. While it's possible that they're simply trying to keep you in their pocket in case their new, single life doesn't work out, it's more likely that they're not yet willing to let go of you completely. If they didn't still have feelings for you, they wouldn't be interested in talking at all - so any form of communication can be a positive indication that things are on the upswing.
Even if they're only responding to your messages, it's a good sign - but it's an even bigger sign if they're going the extra step to maintain or even initiate contact on their own. If they're taking the lead and trying to encourage an extended conversation, let them. Be cordial and keep things light and flowing. By associating communication with a positive response and good energy, they're likely to keep the ball rolling and keep things progressing in a more positive manner.
- They Want to Get Together Face-to-Face
Nothing says anxiety like getting a message from your ex that says that they want to get together in-person. Although your pulse is racing and things seem to be spiraling out of control, the key to a positive face-to-face encounter is to keep things as chill and as calm as possible - and don't let on that you're a ball of nerves beneath the surface.
Your first meeting will often dictate the course of your future encounters. If it goes well, you can bet on the fact that your ex will be interested in seeing you again. A positive experience bodes well for the future. Therefore, it's important that you go into the situation calmly. Keep in mind that your ex is going to be carefully watching you - every movement, every sentence, every gesture. But no pressure, right? Just do the best you can, play it calm and keep things going in a positive and relaxed manner and you can hope for a positive outcome in the end.
- They Start Asking Leading Questions about Your Current Situation
When an ex lingers even after breaking up with you, there's an underlying motive beneath their actions. Usually, and ex wants to make sure that they have a plan to fall back on in case things don't work out the way they think they will. They'll try to keep in the loop about your current circumstances so they can be prepared to act should the right moment present itself - or they start to have a change of heart.
If they start recognizing that there's a whole world of people out there that may find you equally as attractive as you used to, however, you're going to notice a change. They're going to be more curious about your day-to-day life. They'll start asking questions about what you're up to, what's going on in your life - and who you've been keeping busy with. This is a sure-fire sign that they're recognizing that you may slip through their fingers, and that's usually when they'll recognize that if they don't act soon, they may lose the opportunity entirely.
If you call them out on these questions, they'll start to backpedal and try to play it off. They'll try to convince you that they're just being friendly and making conversation - but the reverse is actually true. If your ex starts asking you questions about your love life, it's because they're afraid of losing you for good - and they're weighing out their options in case they decide to take definitive action one way or another.
Being prepared is the ultimate key to success in such an emotionally charged, potentially disastrous situation. If you simply try to fly by the seat of your pants, you're going to end up getting burned, and the last thing you want it's to look backwards at all of the things that you should have said or done that could have potentially inspired a different outcome. You want to make sure that all of your options are wide open and that you're aware of all the potential rewards - or consequences - of taking those actions, or refusing to act.
What's Next?
Hopefully your ex will be exhibiting some of the signs above, but what if they aren't? There are things that you can do to change how your ex currently views you. They are based upon psychological principals and are proven to work. To win back your ex you have to be proactive and have a good plan in place.
The first step is to avoid the common break up mistakes that a lot of people unwittingly make post break up. The next step is to understand and implement proper contact with your ex and how to use it to your advantage. When you get these parts right you will notice a huge change in how your ex views you and interacts with you. Good luck!
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