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Get Your Ex Back From Another Woman - Keep It Secret
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Get Your Ex Back From Another Woman  -  Keep It Secret

You can't count the number of tears that you've cried or the number of chocolate bars you've consumed. Nothing seems to help. You've been dealt a heavy blow. Not only do you have to try and overturn a breakup, you have to find a way to snatch his attention back from someone else who is trying hard to take your place. He's got a new girlfriend and it's all you can do to not burry yourself in the blankets and refuse to emerge. It's not time to give up just yet. Dust yourself off, take a shower and take the initiative. It's time to get to work.

You may have to pull out all the stops and prepare for war. Ironically you're going to be your biggest obstacle - and not his new love. Ask yourself how far you're willing to go to get him back and define your own boundaries. That means you can more easily distance yourself from any actions that would normally make you uncomfortable and devote yourself to the process. The situation is tenuous at best and using every tool possible to gain the upper hand will ultimately help you succeed.

Your toolbox is far from empty and you don't need to push yourself on your ex in order to get his attention. You can use all the tricks of the trade here and enhance your abilities naturally. By being aware of his situation you can inspire trust right off the bat by not throwing yourself at your ex-boyfriend and rubbing it in his new girlfriend's face. You need to consider all the different methods of communication that are now available and pick the one that works best for your personality with respect for him in the process.

Part of that respect is going to require that you do something that goes against everything you want to do. You need to give him and his new girlfriend some space - at least initially. Give them the benefit of enjoying their relationship's new beginning and keep yourself out of it. He's going to be cautious enough of you when you come back into the picture and if you do it too soon, his defenses are going to be up. Give him the sense that you're over him - mostly. Then he can start to relax a little.

That's when you're primed and ready to strike.

Unlike superman you can't leap buildings in a single bound - and you can't get your ex-boyfriend back with one gutsy move either. It takes a lot of different steps to cross that river and you can't just dive right in. To begin the process, you need to start the conversation up again. You can use email here to avoid the problem of his new girlfriend discovering your message accidentally (or on purpose). Come up with a good excuse and go with it. Keep your message easy and simple and wait for a response - it will come. Once it does you've reconnected the communication wires and you're ready to keep going. Slow and steady wins the race.

Listening to him talk about his new girlfriend or his perfect new relationship is going to be like nails on a chalkboard, but you need to grit your teeth and bare it. Don't snap back with a witty or sarcastic response and don't resort to name-calling or petty judgments. Your reaction here is vital to your overall success and the best reaction you can have is none at all. He's looking for one. Don't give him the satisfaction.

If your conversation continues to build and expand your ex-boyfriend is going to eventually give you a call. Be sincere and kind and make sure the conversation flows smoothly by keeping it fun, pleasant and light. While it's imperative that he starts feeling comfortable around you, you need to feel comfortable as well. The more you can foster that underlying connection's growth the more you're moving in the right direction. When he thinks of you, it needs to be positive. Show him how well you're doing post-breakup. He's going to be blown away by your apparent change in attitude.

Relationships change over time and you're probably more aware of that then most. The connection that the two of you shared at one point is going to start to feel normal again - even in your current circumstances. Once he starts to feel that bond take hold, he's going to start becoming even more open about his life, his environment and even his problems. If you start to realize you're on the receiving end of juicy tidbits about his current girlfriend, pay attention but don't allow yourself to contribute to any negativity. Stay as neutral and impassive as possible and if you find yourself starting to slip, don't.

Eventually a meet up in person will be inevitable. You're both looking forward to seeing each other again and it's a kind of "trial run" for your ex to see you again. Ideally, you won't have to do a thing - he'll make the suggestion and all you have to do is show up. Make sure that you meet up in a public place where you both can feel at ease.

Don't try to be someone you're not - just let him see the real you and he is likely to return the favor without a bunch of male bravado. You may experience some butterflies in your stomach at first, but it will pass. If he brings up your past relationship, focus on the good memories and not the rough patches. Every time you guys meet up you're closer to achieving your goal so give your ex-boyfriend a reason to want to hang out again.

You've been hanging out off and on for weeks - possibly months. You think that your friendship is slowly developing into something more and you're picking up on some major physical cues that he's ready and willing to take it to the next level. Good! You've accomplished your goal - almost.

Just because he's shown you repeatedly that he's willing to be with you again (at least in a physical sense) it doesn't have to mean that everything is going to be smooth sailing and you are going to get him back. You know that breakups are difficult and complicated things that have to be done correctly. You've been through this with him before - when you were on the receiving end and not the one encouraging the separation. He needs to make up his mind and handle things his own way and you probably know that process better than most. Trust him to do it and don't make matters even more difficult by sleeping with him prior to his breakup.

Your Next Steps

If you have managed to get your relationship with your ex boyfriend to this stage you are doing well. What if you haven't though? What if he isn't even talking to you and you have no contact anymore? That is when you need to deal with things a little differently. You will have to attract your ex boyfriend. Easier said than done right? Well not necessarily. Once you know the key psychological buttons to press in him, he will be chasing you again and forgetting all about this new girl.

You also have to be critically aware of these break up mistakes that girls commit. The last thing that you want is to do any of these things, they will push him further into the arms of this new woman and you can kiss goodbye to your chances of a reunion. Another tactic at your disposal is jealousy, you have to use it wisely however. To make your ex boyfriend jealous you will need to know how to act, what to say and do. If you get this right you will soon evoke very powerful reactions from him that will let you know that he isn't over you yet.


Street Talk

Thanks3  

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  about 9 years ago
trace  

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  about 9 years ago
trace  

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  about 9 years ago
trace  

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  about 9 years ago
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