The heartache that is often experienced when a break up occurs in a relationship is often unbearable. It gets worse especially if your relationship was special and you loved each other truly. As much as you might want to remove all reminders of your ex, there is always that part of you that would want things to be different and go back to what they were or even better. You might have tried to convince your ex boyfriend that you are the one for them but the reason why they are still angry and drawing further away from you is that you are probably not going about it in the right way.
If you rarely communicate with your ex boyfriend and maybe they don't pick your calls, they will most likely read your texts even if they don't reply. Texting to get your ex back can work if you go about it the right way. It has worked well for many people and this is not to say that you should constantly text and plead with them to have you back. Texting an ex is not an easy thing and that is why many people make a lot of mistakes when texting their exes and mostly succeed in pushing them away and further alienating them instead of drawing them closer. Sometimes the ex will feel that they have to change their number because they feel irked with your constant trickle of badly sounding texts.
Text messaging don'ts
Below are some of the mistakes you should avoid completely if you intend to see your relationship back to full throttle through texting your ex boyfriend. It is advisable that you keep your distance and keep your communication with your ex on the low during that initial period of the break-up. Starting to text a few days after a break-up is a complete no-no. The pain is still raw then. Avoid using an old text that you sent them before because it will not work. This will only make it worse and he will think you uncreative.
Avoid bombarding your ex boyfriend with texts all the time when you do begin texting them; they might feel so overwhelmed and nagged that they might block the texts or simply get bored. Your texts should not sound abusive or harsh in any way or you might provoke a fight. Sending a bitter, threatening or abusive text might really send them running very far away from you or even getting a restraining order and in some cases you might even find yourself in jail courtesy of threateniing or abusive charges. In some countries it is quite a serious offense.
Also steer clear off talking about your relationship or the break up when texting your ex back. This might just provoke another bigger fight. Now, you don't want to give the impression that you ache deeply for them and are desperate to have them back even if this is the case. This might be true and there is nothing wrong with feeling this way, but don't imply so in your texts. You just might ignite an evil streak in them and they might want to hurt you more.
How to text your ex back
To get your ex boyfriend back by text you have to use texts that create positive ideas and feelings in your ex's mind. They are founded from you and ex's favourite memories and encounters that you shared. You will need to make up your mind on the best ones to use since you know them best. Let your texts be warm, friendly and mature sounding. Let your ex know through your texts that you have changed your thought processes and you are now a better person. Sound like a different person and become a mystery to him, evoke feelings of curiosity in them; feelings of wanting to know you again.
Sound like you are doing just fine and are not in any way affected by the break up even if you are. Let your texts sound positive and evoke positive feelings in your ex instead of hostility. Picture your ex boyfriend smiling when they read your text. If it makes you smile it will probably make him smile too.
You might try sending something along these lines: "I went to a Red Hot Chilli Peppers concert and had such a great time, I was reminded of the fun concerts we have attended together. Hope you are doing fine." Or "Went to visit mother and she happened to cook your favourite dish. I couldn't help remembering how much you liked it."
Let your ex know that you are thinking about them without obsessing about them. Don't get flirty unless your texting ex starts and when they start, keep the flirting on minimum mode. If they finally call you then know that you have made progress. Let things take their course and don't rush, rebuild your relationship bit by bit. You have the rest of your lives, no rush.
Your Next Step
Now that you understand why contact with your ex boyfriend is so important after the break up, you now have to learn to use communication to your advantage. Knowing exactly what sort of contact you should be having with your ex boyfriend is crucial. You can use certain techniques to make him want you back and stir him to get in touch with you.
There are some things that you need to be aware of first though. First off, you need to know about some of the common mistakes girls make after a break up. You do not want to be guilty of committing any of these foibles because it will send him running for the hills. It would also be a good idea to read the signs that he likes you. There will be certain clues that he will give off if he is still interested in you, recognising these will give you the impetus to proceed.
Article Views: 12578 Report this Article