Most people assume that separation and divorce are inevitable. Especially in the US, where little value is placed on long-lasting relationships, no one has any idea how to make a relationship based on mutual passion, love, trust, and respect.
But these elements are key in building a relationship that lasts - and your quest of “getting back my wife” is only possible if you incorporate them into your relationship.
Again, those concepts are:
-Passion -Love -Trust -Respect
Looking back, did your relationship include these four things? If you answered yes, then it’s a lot more likely that you’ll be able to re-establish a relationship with your ex-wife. If you answered no, then it’s harder to salvage or make new a relationship, because you never had the foundation to begin with.
What you need to reunite after separation is a plan.
First, you work on yourself. You have to eliminate depression and anxiety over your breakup. See a counselor if need be, or doctor yourself through self-help articles and techniques around the internet. There are tons of ways to combat depression.
The best way ultimately is to combine a healthy diet and an exercise routine with a life filled with your passions. This includes your job - if you aren’t happy in it, start finding ways to get into a career where your heart flourishes.
Then, you should make a list of factors in your relationship that would contribute to your success. Did you both:
-Have shared values? -Shared outlooks on life? -Shared interests and passions?
If you answered yes to any of the above, your relationship probably stands a chance of salvaging.
Finally you need to figure out a way to contact her again. The best way to do this is through a handwritten letter - which shows you really put forth time and effort - and to say, “I’m okay with the breakup. I’m in a really good place in my life right now, and I really hope things are going well for you.” This creates a sense of curiosity in your ex-wife’s mind to make her want to know what’s going on with you, and it also makes her feel like there’s no pressure from you to get back together.
The sense that there is no pressure is very important in re-igniting that spark of passion with your ex. If she feels pressured, she will unconsciously move away from you. But if she thinks you're okay with the breakup and that you don't expect anything from her, she'll start to see you in a different, more positive light.
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