Most of us yearn to live with a partner. But once we have found the person we love, we realize that it is not so easy to live together as we had initially thought.

Some argue that we leave our partners too easy today. Others point out quite rightly how unfree people used to be when even the love and respect was lacking, was forced to live together because of conventions, or for economic or legal coercion.

There are many reasons why people separate or divorce. Of course, the press and stress of our times is an important reason why men and women are powerless in a relationship. But it's also about people's fear and inability to communicate and take responsibility for their feelings and needs.

To get close to another human being, we must know who we are, what we know and what we want. It can be very frightening to know that. And so we walk on to the next relationship and discovers after a while that the problem is almost the same.

Divorce is often a painful process, but it is also an opportunity for growth and development. If you try to learn something about themselves and their own responsibility for the relationship did not work, then it is easier to break old patterns and prevent problems such as broken down a relationship comes with the next.

Remember that it is the people closest to us who can learn most about ourselves. It is only through the second we can meet and understand our own fears and vulnerabilities. But to grow making takes courage. Courage to listen and understand. No man is perfect. We all carry around in a boot that adds difficulties for close relationships in different ways.

What luggage do you carry?

Instead of taking responsibility for what happens people blame his ex and chose self pity.

It's very common that in the context of divorce, when one is vulnerable and fragile, tripping over various light traps. Unconsciously conclude about things that you believe is in a certain way and not as they actually are. We generalize, interpret and misjudge. This creates obvious many needless quarrels that drain power and energy. When you become angry and irritable, are checked against reality: is this really true? Could it be otherwise?

Well, someone might say, if your partner has been unfaithful, neglected children, refused to give information on time and trilskats in every way, so surely we have to get mad!

Of course. Within all of us live drives that can run amok. To be betrayed, insulted and offended puts reason and most inhibitions out of play. There are many classics on the subject. In the film "Dangerous Liaisons" despised and outraged women live out their revenge feelings in the most brutal manner. Restoration has no price. The shock of being betrayed or left, it is natural to experience a strong need for revenge. But there's one thing to think about revenge and another thing to live it out. So a good advice: rent the movies or read books instead of losing yourself and reason. In order to well move on in life? And you might want to finding love again? In that case, you need to do two things: understanding how things fit together. And take responsibility for your life and how you want to live. IF you do not do it, who else can do it?

Sometimes you have to accept that life is both unfair and difficult, but it need not destroy one's life. Also in many cases it is possible to get your ex back. A wise man has said it is important to understand life backwards, but more important is to live it forwards. Allows one's consciousness year after year be filled with destructive thoughts can be sure that you get the biggest loser: the thoughts create negative feelings that lead to destructive behavior.