Getting your ex boyfriend back is not an easy task to take on - especially when you've been dealt the significant emotional blow of a breakup that you didn't see coming. Nothing can hurt deeper than being caught unaware and feeling as though you were left behind. While there are many open avenues to make him come back to you, finding the right one can be one of the most difficult choices you make. Like all choices, there are good ones and bad. The bad ones can ruin your chances permanently. The good ones, however, can lift your spirits and bring your ex-boyfriend running back to you without you having to lose your self-respect in the process.

Step 1 - Exhibit Maturity in the Face of Adversity:

It takes one hell of a woman to stare rejection in the face and respond with dignity and grace - and you just topped the charts. You managed to hold it together until you were out of sight. Then you lost it completely. That's par for the course, and you have nothing to be ashamed of.

It may be impossible to believe that your relationship has actually ended, but it has. The quicker you can realize that it's over, the quicker you can make some steps to make sure that the breakup doesn't last for long. Acceptance is simply a stage in the process that must be recognized before moving forward.

Now comes the hard part. If you thought recognizing that he broke up with you was hard, this one is going to really stink. You need to stop talking to him completely. Between texts, emails, phone calls and evenings together, talking to your ex has become a staple in your every-day life. All that needs to stop. Once communication has come to a standstill for at least a month, your ex is going to wonder why. He may have been expecting you to chase him down for another chance. You're not going to give in to temptation and live up to his expectations. Only then can he start to miss having you around, so make him miss you!

Step 2 - Encourage a Change:

Getting out of the breakup mindset requires some high-powered distractions. Not only will they help take your mind off of your ex and how much he hurt you, they'll appeal to sides of yourself that may have fallen by the wayside while you were in a romantic relationship. How many times have you wanted to sit down and finish that book? Now is your chance to funnel all of your creative energies into something that you love.

Exercise should also become a regular part of your routine again. By getting regular exercise, you are allowing your body to help cope with all the stress often associated with breakups. Uncertainty has a way of setting you on edge, and nothing can ease the strain like some cardio. By taking an active role in your physical health, you're improving your mental health as well. You want to look and feel your best when it's time to establish contact again, and exercise can be the perfect path to take.

Step 3 - Focus on Friendship

A lot of times romance causes other friendships to suffer. With so much time and energy being channeled into a romantic relationship, it's hard to balance out the rest of your life and take time for yourself and your group. Think of this as a time to mend many different kinds of fences - even the ones with your friends. Being surrounded by people who love you unconditionally is the best medicine for a broken heart. They can keep your mind occupied and give you the gift of laughter, no matter how much the breakup may have hurt.

While you're slowly regaining your sense of self and your confidence, your ex-boyfriend has been sitting at home waiting for the phone to ring. He thought he had the upper hand because he chose to end things, but now he's realizing that he was wrong. Guys have a natural curiosity about their exes and nothing fuels that fire like refusing to play the game the way he expected.

He's going to be calling you before you know it and when that phone does ring, he's going to have a lot of questions. Redefining and revamping your strengths while regaining your confidence is going to send his interest through the roof. You didn't have to chase him down. Instead, you put the shoe on the other foot and he's going to be dying for a second chance with you - not the other way around.

Your Next Steps

You won't have to say "make him come back to me" for much longer if you follow the steps above as well as implementing some effective get him back strategies. You need to know how he actually feels about you at this point because you don't want to make a fool of yourself in front of him if he has already moved on. Read his body language and decipher what he really means with these signs he still loves you.