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Reasons Why He Won't Take You Back - Learn Them
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Reasons Why He Won\'t Take You Back  -  Learn Them

There are many reasons why he won't take you back, you have to understand them if you want to stand any chance of getting him back again. Only when you begin to see things from his perspective can you start to put things right and encourage a romantic connection with you again.

Take a look at the reasons why he might not want to get back together with you below. Maybe you are guilty of doing some or all of them. Do not panic if you have committed these mistakes before, you can put things right if you are smart about it. Be honest with yourself here, there is no point in lying that you are not doing anything wrong.

- Attempting to Assert Control

Guys take a lot of pride in their independence, and you probably do as well. How did you and your boyfriend interact when you were still together? Did he feel like he had to ask if it was okay for him to have a guy's night out? Were you always nagging him to clean his stuff up and filling the role of a parent more than a significant other? If the answer to any of those questions was yes, it's highly likely that the breakup was a way of asserting his own control over his life, and get out from under yours. The good news is that this bad habit is one that is easily controlled and changed for the better.

- Repeat Uninvited Contact

Do you know what your ex is up to at every single moment of every single day because of Facebook or other social media outlets? Do you get a little antsy when he hasn't updated his status in a few hours, and he's not responding to texts or emails? If you've flooded his inbox with every form of message possible only to get no response, it's possible that you're taking contact to an extreme that can easily be construed as overbearing or overwhelming.

You may think that contacting your ex over and over again will make him remember you and keep the memory of your relationship alive, but the reverse is actually true. Your ex is not going to give your breakup a second thought if they don't have the time to draw their own conclusions. Not only that, but how can they start to miss you if you're just never gone? It's best to simply back off and allow your ex some breathing room. You may be surprised to receive a phone call or text from your ex wondering where you've gone.

- Threats with No Consequences

What could you possibly believe that you have to hang over an ex-boyfriend's head? In reality, you have nothing. Worst-case scenario you could blab some embarrassing info to his friends - but all that's going to do is piss him off and isolate you from him for a long time into the future. While that all makes logical, rational sense, it's not something that occurs to a lot of women in your position. They tend to give their exes timelines and ultimatums or downright threats to try and regain control of a situation that is clearly out of their hands.

This behavior is childish and immature and only justifies his belief that leaving you was for the best. Your best option is to genuinely think before you speak, and don't let your emotions get the best of you. It's impossible to take something back, and you can't go back in time. Don't wind up saying something that you'll soon come to regret as your chance to get back together slips out of your fingers for good.

- Mind Games and Emotional Assertions

The key to getting into your ex-boyfriend's head and figuring out what's really happening in there is not by twisting the emotional card in order to gain his sympathy. Pity is simply not something that should be encouraged when you're trying to foster a renewed relationship. It paints you in an incredibly negative light, makes you seem even more desperate and crazy and can destroy any remaining trust or respect that the two of you share. If you know you can get a reaction any time you want, you'll feel a small sense of power or vindication - and how much do you really respect someone that you can so easily manipulate.

On his side, how much could he continually respect a woman who knows what buttons to press - and has no reservations when it comes to pressing them repeatedly. Instead of becoming a funny story for him to relay to all of his friends, maintain your dignity and self-respect. When you respect yourself, you foster a natural respect in others. Even though he ended the relationship, his feelings and respects may remain pretty much in tact - and you don't want to cripple your chances indefinitely by going the extra step to destroy that now.

Your Next Steps

Okay, so now you see that there are lots of behaviours that can turn your ex boyfriend off and discourage him from getting back together with you. There are things that you can do about it though - it is not over yet! Take a look at the reasoning behind the no contact rule and how it works if you want to get him back.

Also be on the lookout for the signs he still loves you. He might have feelings for you after the break up but still not want to get back together, it is up to you to read between the lines here and figure out how he really feels about you.


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