So you have heard those dreaded words "we need to take a break" and now you are wondering where you should go from here. When someone tells you that they want to take a break it is usually a sign that they want to take the easy way out of the relationship. They don't have the courage to say that they want to break up because they want to leave the option of returning to you open.

Now that you find yourself in limbo you don't know where you stand. You are trying to work out why your ex wants to take a break. Was it something that you did? Is there another person in the picture? Does your ex have commitment issues? Does your ex not love you anymore? These are all questions that are surely going through your mind right about now.

The likelihood is you only agreed to "the break" because you didn't want to lose the person that you love, you are hoping that the situation that you now find yourself in is temporary. The difference between "taking a break" and breaking up is negligible, in essence they both mean the same thing. That is the harsh reality of the situation.

The Pain Of Being In Limbo

You have no doubt tried to talk to your ex about what they are doing and what it really means. Chances are you were met with a stone wall. Every time you try to get in contact you are either ignored or you only get vague answers to your questions delivered in a cold, glib manner before you are fobbed off.

It is very hurtful when someone that you love refuses to be straight with you. Someone who you shared so much with is now treating you like garbage, or at least that is what it feels like. You deserve to be respected, you also deserve straight answers to your questions. The truth is, as long as your ex is in "take a break" mode they won't be forthcoming, they will want to keep you hanging around as a fall back plan.

Give Your Ex The Break That They Are Looking For

Your ex put you in an extremely difficult position. Basically, they put the relationship on ice so that they could go and play the field, or live it up as a singleton. They want to keep you as a fallback in case that their plans don't work out. Don't tolerate this! When your ex plays the "let's take a break" card you should counter it by playing the breakup card. After all, why should you put your life on hold just because your ex wants to take a break? Why should you be tormented by not knowing what is really going on?

Give them a taste of their own medicine and see how they like it. Tell your ex that you will not be put on the substitute bench while they go out and play the field. Tell them that you won't be waiting with baited breath while they take their break. This course of action may seem extreme, but believe me, it is essential if you want to put your relationship back on track again. It is imperative that you take control of the situation you now find yourself in, doing so will put you in a much stronger position.

Your Ex Will Start To Reconsider

Once the "take a break" idea has been put to sleep your ex will have to wake up and smell the proverbial coffee. Their selfishness will have led to them to the point where they are no longer taking a break because you broke up with them. This will cause your ex to reevaluate the situation, and maybe even reflect on how selfish they were.

Even though you were the one that officially sealed the breakup you should look at it as if your ex broke up with you. It was your ex that wanted to take a break, don't forget that. The best thing that you can do at this stage is retreat and let your ex come back to their senses.

Cut all contact, drop off your ex's radar. Give your ex the time to reflect on how stupid they were, it won't be long before they start to miss you. When your ex realizes that you are serious they will start to panic, they will not want to lose you forever. Stay strong and hold your ground, do not be tempted to contact your ex, let them contact you. This is the key needed to win your ex back.

What Do I Do Now?

The first thing that you will need to learn about is how to avoid breakup mistakes. Most people in the position that you are in now go about getting their ex back in all the wrong ways, their actions actually copper-fasten the breakup. You need to know what you are doing if you want to save your relationship.

The second thing that you will need to learn about is the no contact rule. Knowing how the no contact rule works is essential, it will be the strongest weapon in your arsenal. Quitting is easy, but quitters never succeed. If the love that you have for your ex is real, and the relationship is worth saving, then you have to do everything in your power to win your ex back.