Courtship is hard; maintaining a relationship is harder; going through a breakup however is the hardest. But whatever the reason for calling it off, what’s common is the heartache that lingers for a while. Even if you cry out loud and tell the world, “I want ex back” the fact will remain and you will still find yourself hurting and longing for the one you love.

During these hard times, it is easy to let yourself go and be dominated by what your heart wants – your ex. However, running off to get back with your ex is not really a good idea. Letting your heart win against your head for the whole matter is even worse.

No communication

If it was your ex who broke up with you, better leave him/her alone and give the time and space that he/she so deserves. Sending tons of SMS and leaving a bucket of IMs would not help. Avoid calling your ex too. These may instead worsen your already tainted relationship and show how devastaed and desperate you are. Try to give it a rest and do not contact your ex for a couple of weeks. Pretend that you actually don’t exist to your ex. It may hurt you more now as you would eagerly yearn for the person you love, but this is probably the best thing to do to not make your ex tired and fed up with you.

Do not be seen

If you and your ex used to stay all day at the park or hangout at a certain café, skip these places and go somewhere else when you’re with friends, family, or even alone. Being in the place you and your ex always frequent can only increase the chances of having to see your ex again. By now you probably want to see him/her so badly. However, this is probably not a good idea because it may only leave you more hurt than ever. Seeing someone you love who doesn’t care can make you end up further heartbroken. And even though you know he’ll not be in these places at certain times, having to reminisce the past when you were still together at this restaurant or gallery will only leave you with tears.

Do nothing

Although you may still think “I really want my ex back,” it is best to not do anything at the moment. Making desperate attempts of getting back with him/her may just push your ex further away. It may sound a little silly, but doing nothing is a foolproof way to not mess anything up. You may actually succeed by taking the risk and pushing youself to the person you love. However, more often than not, it will just drive your ex off to run farther away from you.

Just focus on yourself

Flashbacks of your ex will probably haunt you every time you’re reminded of how beautiful your relationship was. However, you have to fight it and try to make yourself occupied. Go out and have some fun. Do not stay in your rut. You can become a better person.