When a couple experiences a breakup, everything between them changes. The dynamic that you used to know and love no longer exists. They don't spend every waking moment together anymore, and they tend to go their own separate ways. They aren't naturally invested in the goings on of their previous partner's life. Each situation is different unique and no breakup can be compared to another. Sometimes one partner just cuts off all communication completely. This is usually done suddenly with little to no warning, and it can take the other partner completely by surprise.
If it's happened to you, you're probably wondering why your ex is suddenly ignoring you when you used to be so close. You need to understand the reasons behind why this is happening in order to successfully move past it. You probably still hope for a future between the two of you, and this seems like a huge obstacle in your path. You need to take some time to learn about his behavior and gain some valuable insight that will help you understand what's going on in his head.
You're probably experiencing a great deal of frustration while you're questioning the reasons behind his sudden "silent treatment". It's difficult to be ignored, especially by someone that you used to share a deep connection with. He's no longer responding to your texts or phone calls and it can be completely exasperating. You will probably become more and more upset the longer this continues. You'll start to feel unimportant and unloved. Some crazy thoughts might cross your mind - radical actions in order to get his attention again. Don't let these impulses get the best of you - you'd only be making a huge mistake that can drive him away for good.
He finds Talking to you difficult
In order to reconnect, you first need to understand why he's ignoring you. Before you can learn to deal with his new change in policy, you need to understand the reasons behind it. The first thing you need to realize is that you shouldn't be taking this personally. Just because he's ignoring you at the moment doesn't mean that he doesn't care about you. He may simply be ignoring you because he does still have feelings with you and he's having a hard time coming to grips with those feelings now that the relationship is over. Avoid jumping to unnecessary conclusions, as difficult as that may be. Instead of letting your imagination run away from you, take a step back and try to see the situation maturely.
A lot of guys take breakups especially hard. They try to play it off like they're cool and collected, but the opposite is usually true. This is even more the case when the breakup wasn't his call. They need adequate time and space to adjust to their new situations and this space can last for several weeks after the breakup took place. This can provide valuable insight into the reasons why he's not returning your phone calls. He's trying to focus on himself and get his own feelings in check.
If you're wondering what you did wrong in order to trigger this new-found behavior, then maybe you need to start reevaluating the relationship before the breakup ever took place. If you never apologized for the mistakes you made while you were still together, now is the opportune time. If you can't think of anything that warrants a real, sincere apology, then you probably have some more thinking to do. Keep in mind that your ex has a different perspective that you do. Maybe something that didn't seem like a big deal to you really hurt his feelings. It makes no sense to apologize for something if you don't know why you're apologizing. There's nothing worse than an insincere apology, and doing so will only upset him more.
If you really caused a significant blow to his ego and hurt his feelings, he may be trying to get back at you by ignoring you. He probably knows that ignoring you is one of the best ways to get even, since it makes you feel depressed and insecure. If he broke up with you, however, ignoring you could be nothing more than a game on his part. Chances are he's trying to provoke a reaction in the one way that he believes is guaranteed. He wants to know that you still care and that his actions can still affect the way you feel.
When you contact him, his ego is being restored, and it makes him feel wanted. He can gain a huge amount of satisfaction from this contact, even though it may seem incredibly cruel or immature. Emotions are often running high after a breakup, and not everyone is capable of thinking clearly or making mature decisions.
If you come to the realization that he is ignoring you or giving you the silent treatment, the best thing you can do is to stop trying to get in touch with him - even if you think it's important. If you are continually trying to establish contact after he's made it clear that he's not interested at this time, you will be smothering him emotionally. Avoid the urge to leave long, drawn out voicemails about how much you miss him. Put down the phone instead of texting him 20 times a day, and don't go on stalking his Facebook profile.
For now, your best course of action is just to let him be. Give him some space - it's probably best for you both. It will give both of you the chance to deal with your heightened emotions and allow you to heal. Once he has some space, he will start to realize how lonely life is without you. Then you can start to expect some contact on his end - not yours. Then this brief period of silence will be long gone.
Don't take it too personally if your ex is ignoring you, and don't worry about it. There are certain steps you can take to turn this process around and get him back again. You don't have to suffer the humiliation of acting childish in front of him either. There are ways that you can get him to contact you without having to lift a figure. All the secrets to his behavior are inherent traits that can be discovered by learning about the male psyche.
Are you curious to know if your ex boyfriend still loves you, you can easily find out by reading his badly language and his behaviour. There are signs he still loves you, you just have to look out for them.
Article Views: 18502 Report this Article