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Why Won't My Ex Take Me Back? - Maybe You're Making These Mistakes
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Why Won\'t My Ex Take Me Back?  -  Maybe You\'re Making These Mistakes

Maybe you are sitting there confused about why your ex wont take you back. You have tried everything short of outright begging and nothing seems to be working - your ex isn't budging. This can be extremely frustrating and hurtful especially if you want to give things another go and they just don't seem interested anymore.

There is a possibility that your ex would be interested in getting back together with you, but you are doing all of the wrong things right now to make that possible. When you start examining exactly what you are doing wrong and how that will look to your ex, instead of trying to force the issue, you will get a very clear insight why your ex won't take you back.

The truth is, there is a right way and a wrong way to go about winning back your ex's heart. If you are honest with yourself, up until now you have been doing all of the wrong things. The reason why many people fail is because they act on instinct. In this scenario this is not a good idea because emotional decisions could end up making you look desperate, crazy, unreasonable and pathetic. You need to be able to take a step back and think before you act.

Take a look at the main mistakes people make when trying to get their exes back. These behaviors will only push your ex away. Are you doing any of these things? If so, stop right now, take a deep breath and change tack.

Not Giving Your Ex Any Space

This is a huge reason why your ex won't take you back. It is normal to want to be with your ex after the break up. Readjusting to the a life without the person that you love is never easy. It might be tempting to stay in touch with your ex and right them at any given moment. You can't do this. Remember that you have broken up - this means that there are automatic and unspoken boundaries immediately after the break up. Even if you have both agreed to remain friends, hanging out and texting each other as if nothing has happened will just feel awkward and unnatural to your ex.

Your ex will need time to process the break up and decide on the future. So do you even if you don't think so right now. Having a bit of space from your ex can actually work in your favour. It will encourage your ex to miss you and think about what life without you is like. This is a lot more effective than crowding your ex and hoping that they see sense through coercion from you. Back off for a while and let the dust settle. If you are tempted to ring your ex then you should be trying to do more to occupy your time. Stop and think about how constant contact will look to your ex - do you still think that it is a good idea now?

Being Depressed Or Feeling Sorry For Yourself

No matter how tempting it is to wallow in self pity after the break up, you will have to nip this type of negative behaviour in the bud. You might think that your ex is not bothered about you or that they don't care or notice how you are taking the break up. Nothing could be further from the truth. It doesn't matter who initiated the break up, your ex will be curious about how you are coping because it will give them an ego boost knowing that you are cut up about it. When you don't act in the way that they expected they will suddenly sit up and take notice of you again. They will also begin to question why you are not wallowing indoors like they anticipated.

Feeling sorry for yourself is very unattractive to your ex. The last thing that you want to do is to make them pity you - no one wants to be with someone that they pity. You have to maintain some semblance if self respect, even if you are faking it. Respect is the key to making your ex want you again. If they respect you and how you are handling the break up, they are more likely to see you in a new light and question why they are not with you anymore.

Promising To Change

If you cheated and this is what caused your break up, promising to change is a normal part of the reconciliation process. Your ex will want to hear it, but deep down they will think that your words are hollow. This is why you should not concentrate on the "I will change" part. You have to ask yourself what are you changing for? Does your ex just want someone different and you think that you should do anything to give them what they want? If this is the case then it just won't work. Changing for anyone will only leave you feeling resentful and the relationship will be based on lies. Your ex saw something special in you once, they can again if you do not lose sense of your identity and try to fit into some preconceived mould.

When you promise to change you also have to mean it - oftentimes it is just something that you say to get your own way and you know deep down that you won't see it through. Empty promises will be lost on your ex. They will only view you as weak and desperate enough to do anything to get them back. Again this is unattractive and your ex will lose whatever respect that they had for you.

Acting Like A Crazy Stalker

We have all done it, driving by an ex's house late at night to see what they were doing. Bumping into them accidentally on purpose because we know their schedule down to a tee. You might think that you're being subtle with all of your casual chance meetings but your ex will know exactly what you are up to. Do you really want to be labelled as a stalker? The last thing that you want to do is frighten your ex or make them wary of you. You will accomplish exactly that if you don't back off a bit and fight the urge to see your ex.

Stalking does not just apply to the physical realm either. Nowadays it is very easy to stalk your ex online through social mediums like Facebook. Leaving cryptic messages on their wall or your own will be hugely obvious to your ex. Even if you are sitting on Facebook for hours on end trying to find clues about what your ex is up to, do NOT let your ex know this by liking their pics or poking them constantly. It will only make you look like an unhinged desperado with nothing better to do than troll their profile. This is ugly behaviour and your ex will be turned off you for good if you continue down this slippery slope.

Your Next Step

These are just some of the mistakes that you could be making right now and probably why your ex won't take you back. Now that you know what NOT to do it is time that you start doing the right things to make your ex want you again.

Take a look at these get your ex back techniques - they will put you on the right track and teach you where to go from here. A huge secret of winning your ex back is contact. You will need to understand the ins and outs of post break up contact if you are to turn your situation around and make your ex pine for you and get them to do the chasing.


Street Talk

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