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vital steps
guilt trips
psychological approach
different perspective
mind games
tough times
reality check
Win My Ex Boyfriend Back - Vital Steps To Take
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Win My Ex Boyfriend Back  -  Vital Steps To Take

If you want to win your ex boyfriend back you will need to be aware of some things before you begin. You have to take the right approach to be successful. The normal routes of using mind games, force or guilt trips will NEVER work in the long run. You want your ex boyfriend to be with you out of choice, not because he was forced or cajoled into it. This is why you have to take the psychological approach to experience any kind of success. Don't worry, this does not involve manipulation in any way, you will merely be encouraging your ex boyfriend to respond in a more favorable way and make him see things for himself.

Be Patient

Winning back an ex boyfriend takes time. You will not wake up one day and find him standing at the foot of your bed with flowers and professing his undying love for you. As creepy as that sounds, it is probably what you secretly want. A reality check is needed here though. You have to be realistic in your aims or you will only be bitterly disappointed when he does not respond in the way that you had hoped.

Be prepared for a lot of hard work on your part to make things possible. There will be tough times, but your willpower is needed to speed things up. When you start to see a change in the way that your ex boyfriend sees you, it will give you the motivation to stick at it and make you realise that waiting is the only successful way to deal with things.

Charging in and demanding to get back together will never work, you will only push him further and further away. He will not appreciate being rushed or forced into things that he is not ready for. You broke up for a reason, so you have to deal with those reasons first before you can get him back. Being premature will make you look unstable, desperate and selfish - this is not how you want him to see you. Respect his need for space and use this time constructively.

Start To See Things From His Perspective

Take a step back and try to reassess the situation from a different perspective. Block out what you are experiencing and try to look at things from his perspective - how does your behaviour look to him right now? Is he glad the relationship is over? What does he want from you post break up? What do your friends and family think about the break up and how you are handling it?

Facing up to the truth here is essential. You will probably find out some less than favourable things about yourself and your actions. That is okay, we all do wrong things when our emotions are involved, it is only natural. It is good if you can start to see things differently and how your behaviour could be interpreted badly by him. This is progress and something that you can deal with right away.

Contact With Your Ex Boyfriend

If you want to win your ex boyfriend back you will have to be strict with yourself in terms of contact. Things have changed and you cannot expect to ring and text him like you did when you were together. There are unspoken boundaries here that need to be respected. Your ex boyfriend needs to see that you have accepted the break up (at least on the outside) and that you are dealing with it in a mature way.

A large part of this means facing up to the changes in your relationship dynamic. You are now his ex, you cannot pester him like before or send him cute messages, at least not for now. This would seriously perturb him and make him think that you are a bunny boiler who doesn't really understand that they have been dumped. I know that this sounds harsh, but it is for your own good. You need to make him think about you positively and regret the break up. When you are constantly communicating with him it will ot reflect well on you.

Another great aspect about no contact is that it will give him the chance to miss you. If you are always there in cyber space or in person, he will still have you in his life in some way. He was probably relying on this too so that he could wean himself off you slowly and not have to deal with a complete void. Don't give him what he wants. He has to see that his decision meant that he would lose you completely, he cannot have his cake and eat it here.

So remember, as tempting as it is to text him or leave cryptic facebook wall posts, you are only fooling yourself. He will know what you are doing and it will look kind of pathetic. If you really want to make him sit up and take notice of you again, you have to pretend that you are too busy for facebook or contacting him. Only then will he be spurred into action with the thought that he could lose you forever.

Your Next Steps

Are you still asking yourself "how to win my ex boyfriend back?" You have a lot more work to do in terms of understanding the male psyche and how to use psychological techniques to make him see you as a potential girlfriend again. The first thing that you have to do is make yourself aware of these break up mistakes. Lots of girls have no idea that they are doing anything wrong and are guilty of at least one of these things. Also watch out for signs he still likes you. You need to know how he really feels through what he says and how he acts around you.

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