Breakups are full of negative emotions that are often difficult to overcome. Overcoming your lingering negativity, however, is simply the first step on a marathon journey if you're intent on winning back your ex and starting a new romantic relationship with them. Obviously you can't simply blink and expect things to change - action must be taken. How do you know which actions are going to propel you forward, and which ones are going to leave you behind in the dust? If you act decisively and carefully, you may just be surprised at how positive a reaction you receive. If you make one mistake too many, however, you may just have to kiss your chances goodbye and say farewell to your ex for good.

If you did a poll to determine the most effective and powerful weapons in the war to get back together with an ex, jealousy would probably top the list. It's truly a unique and powerful tool that can have practically instantaneous and effective results - as long as you're willing to put it to good use.

Using jealousy to your advantage can definitely get you closer to your goal, but it's a little bit like playing with fire. If you turn your back for a moment, it can turn on you and become dangerous and out of control. In order to safely use jealousy to your advantage, you need to understand that a little bit goes a long way - and that less is definitely more. One of the most common uses is to immediately go out and hook up with someone new - but that's a dangerous tactic if you're only doing it to try to manipulate your ex, and it's almost guarantee to backfire on you.

When it comes to exes, moderation is going to be the eventual key to your success. That means that you can't smack them over the head with the jealousy stick and expect no repercussions whatsoever. If you want to count jealousy as a tactical advantage, go right ahead - but be very wary of how you put it into play. In other words, don't go jump into a new relationship just because you want to make them as jealous as possible sooner rather than later. Not only are you manipulating your ex, but you're using an innocent bystander and painting yourself in a pathetic light in the process. Your game is going to be uncovered eventually, and you're going to be left holding the bag with nothing to show for it but a memory of failure and regret.

If you feel like it's genuinely time to move on, then jumping into the dating pool may be a good first move, as long as you're doing it for your benefit - and not only for the sake of creating jealousy in your ex.

As hard as it may be for you to force yourself to view the situation objectively, when you take the time to actually weigh your options you'll discover that you can receive a lot of benefit from putting yourself out there socially. Not only can you find a productive, positive release for a lot of your pent-up emotions, but you can also expand your social network to include lots of different types of people. If the right opportunity happens to present itself, you may be open to the possibility of dating again.

When it comes to dating again, however, you want to make sure that your motivation is purely for your own gain - and not to intentionally hurt or damage your ex by trying to create jealousy intentionally. Not only are you in essence victimizing the poor person, who ends up in your web unintentionally, but you're also not gaining anything positive out of the experience, and you're not likely to end up on the winning side of the equation. Dating is a matter of personal preference, and if you go into it with a positive outlook accepting the many different possibilities, you can in turn receive a lot of positive benefits whereas going into it negatively can only have a negative payoff over time.

Jealousy is a powerful but inherently negative tactic to winning an ex back into your arms. Since it does carry such a negative connotation, it should never be your first line of defense when dealing with a breakup scenario. Don't leave from your breakup and immediately hook up with someone else because you know it will make your ex jealous. Jealousy, when used correctly, is subtle and indirect - and that's also when it has the highest rate of success. Not when you lure an ex into it with the sole purpose of trying to make it happen.

Since you should only use jealousy sparingly or as a last measure before giving up entirely, look into the other ways available to help you get your ex back first. Not only are these tactics profitable and positive, they also have a high rate of success and can make the process quicker and smother overall. They should be your immediate response, and jealousy should only be your back up plan further down the road when you realize you're just not getting anywhere any other way.

What To Do Next

Making your ex jealous to win them back is a very dangerous game to play and it could backfire on you. There are more effective ways to win your ex back using psychology. Understanding why you were dumped in the first place will allow you to see inside your ex's head and work out what it was that made them stop seeing you romantically.

Another effective strategy is to use the no contact rule. It can go a long way in reversing your ex's current perception of you and make them do the chasing instead.