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It's time to sit back and take stock of your situation. Your ex ended your relationship and left you behind. No matter what reason or excuse they came up with, you had no say in the matter whatsoever. Displays of emotion didn't seem to work. Anger and arguments failed as well. Now you're left with nothing except a desire to regain your relationship and bring it back to the happy moments you remember.
What can you do to make that happen? Essentially, the key ingredient is careful consideration. You need to act intelligently and not just jump at the first idea that comes to mind. While impulsive decisions may get a reaction from your ex, that doesn't mean that it's necessarily the reaction you're hoping for. Chances are not very good that they're just going to up and change their mind on a whim and take you back. If you want it to happen, you have to bring a plan to light that will maximize your chances while minimizing their desire to run away as fast as possible - and that means first and foremost that you have to get yourself under control.
Controlling your emotions may be no easy feat at the moment. You're hurt, you're anger and you may be bitter. It's understandable. Whenever you look at your ex, you feel like your insides are being ripped out, and that feeling is all too common. It's simple jealousy at its finest - and most destructive. When used properly, jealousy can be the ultimate tool to getting back together with your ex. When used incorrectly, it can be the final nail in the breakup coffin and make sure you never get another chance with them. It's dangerous and deadly, and if you're not careful it can be fatal. When it comes to the return of a romantic relationship, you need to be even more cautious. Does that mean that you should start dating someone else to make your ex feel jealous?
The simple answer is absolutely not. Here is where things start to get messy. Jealousy should ultimately be viewed as a perk - not a privilege. It is easily overused and abused by those that want to get back at an ex - or get control over their attention again. That's why starting a new relationship only to make an ex jealous never works out long-term, and attempting it is only hurting three people in the process. It's hurting your unintentional victim that you started dating when you're not really interested at all, it's hurting you by wiping out any chance you actually had at getting back together with your ex, and it's hurting your ex as well - although that hurt may translate to anger rather quickly, and you can't really blame them if it does.
Dating someone new should be a decision that you come to on your own when the time is right. Don't let such a big move have underlying ulterior motives, and don't do it simply to try and get a reaction. If you make the choice to explore your dating options and you discover that your ex is jealous in the process, think of it as icing on the cake - not the whole meal.
If you're thinking about hanging out with friends or going out to the bar just to get out of the house, go for it! There is absolutely nothing stopping you from exploring all the options available to you. It's easy to get tunnel vision after a breakup when all you can focus on is the option that you want, but by putting those blinders on, you're limiting your potential - and you may just miss a golden opportunity entirely because of it.
You're not being held at gunpoint to immediately start dating everyone that crosses your path. You have the option to date, or to hold off for a while until you are in a better place mentally. When you do start dating again, make sure that the person you're doing it for is you - not the new person in your life, and most certainly not for your ex. By going into it aware of your motivation, you're limiting the potential for negative blowback - and you're also opening yourself up to positive results.
Jealousy can certainly get your ex's attention - but that attention may not be all positive if you try to make it happen or manipulate it into place. When jealousy is only a side benefit and not an end-goal, it can have a tremendous impact on your overall chances. Your ex may reach out and contact you out of the blue. Their curiosity may be kicked up a few notches - and they'll be dying for the chance to find out what you've been up to, and what new things have been going on in your life since you went your separate ways.
If you're going to view jealousy as a potential tool in your breakup kit, make sure you keep it guarded well. It should never be something that is used out of spite, vindictiveness or desperation - especially if you're hoping to eventually get your romance with your ex going again. If it is put into play, make sure that it's when your other options are thoroughly exhausted. Instead of being a first response, make it one of the last. Focus on the positive, instead, and look for an option that can help you out in your own individual situation - not one that can potentially cause a lot more harm.
What To Do Next
Hopefully you now understand that there are better tools in your arsenal than making your ex jealous. One such tool in the no contact rule. Surprisingly it is incredibly effective to win your ex back and their admiration for you.
A good place to start though would be to avoid common break up mistakes that people make. When you do these things it only ends up pushing your ex further and further away from you, so stay away from these things at all costs.
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