Have you just broken up with a boyfriend or girlfriend?  Let me tell you that you are not alone.  This has happened to almost everyone.  The tough part is when you are the one that doesn’t want it.  Maybe you really messed up, and your partner couldn’t forgive you, or maybe your partner messed up and you couldn’t forgive them.

First of all I recommend that you give it a little time.  If the break up just happened chances are you are still dealing with a lot of emotion.  It is very hard to make a good decision when you have so much emotion.  Take some time to sort through your feelings.  Not only do you deserve that time, but I am sure that your partner needs that time as well.  Once you have had time to think things through you can decide if the relationship is something that you want to save or let go.

If you decide that the relationship is something that you want to work on, and you are the one that made the mistake apologize.  It is so hard for us to admit that we are wrong, but it is equally important to own up to your mistake.  Make sure that your apology is sincere.  You may think that you have already done this, but your partner may not think that you are sincere.  It may take a little time for them to fully believe that you truly are sorry for what you did. 

Forgiving is also an important step in the process of getting back together.  You may be the one that needs to forgive or you may be the forgiver.  Either way you need to make sure that you do forgive.  This does not necessarily mean that you forget, but you can’t move on unless you forgive.  This also means that if you do get back together and have an argument you cannot keep throwing back in their face.  This is something that is over and done with.

If you have changed as a person since you met your partner that is fine.  Maybe you have changed so much that the two of you do not work anymore.  Let them see the real you.  If you are trying to be fake, and just “fix” what they thought wasn’t working the relationship is not going to work and you will be right back at the beginning. 

Relationships are hard work, and if you want to fight to get back what you had do it.  You have nothing to lose.