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Some people may scoff at the idea of anyone suffering stress at being single on Valentine’s Day but for some people it can be devastating. I know someone who every year sent themselves half a dozen Valentine’s cards so desperate were they to cover up the fact that they weren’t enjoying a romantic relationship. One year they even sent themselves a dozen red roses. The sad thing was that the flowers didn’t give them any pleasure, they only sat in their home as a constant reminder of the fact they felt unloved.
Of course there are plenty of people who are single and are quite content to be so and are happy to let an event like Valentine’s Day pass them by, but if the scenario above resonates with you here are some tips to reduce the stress of being single on Valentine’s Day.
Don’t send cards or gifts to yourself
It may give you some temporary relief sending cards or gifts to yourself to pretend to your fellow students or work colleagues that you have someone special in your life but believe me it really will only be temporary. Then when you’re at home by yourself you won’t be able to keep the sham up and it will only make you feel more miserable. Much better just to treat yourself to something – nice box of chocolates, a new gadget, a meal out ... It doesn’t really matter what it is – just something you enjoy.
Plan something to do
Planning something to do is much better than wandering around your home feeling miserable and thinking that you’re the only unloved person in the world. Meeting up with friends is one option and either going out for the evening or inviting them over for a meal or an evening of watching films or playing board games.
If you actually prefer to be by yourself, it’s still worth planning something specific to do like watching a film, spending time soaking in a hot bath with a book, cooking a special meal, long phone call with an old friend, going for a run, trying out a new gadget, watching a film whilst eating your favourite chocolates .... It doesn’t matter how you spend the evening as long as your focus is on you enjoying yourself and being positive rather than negative.
Avoid negative self talk
If you’re wishing that you were in a relationship then it can be tempting on Valentine’s Day to indulge in a whole lot of negative self talk and feel sorry for yourself. Don’t. It’s a waste of time and it will sap all your energy. You’re not the only one in the world who’s single. If this is a real problem for you then you need to do something concrete to increase your chances of meeting someone.
Summary
It may not be much fun if you’re single on Valentine’s Day and you don’t want to be, but it’s important that you take control and plan to do things that you enjoy and don’t sink into a cycle of negative self talk and feel sorry for yourself. It’s up to you whether you make a choice to enjoy yourself or not.
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