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domestic violence
silent crime
language mastery
second pregnancy
cycle of abuse
physical aspect
The Face Of Domestic Violence In China Brings A Culture Of Secrecy To Light
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The Face Of Domestic Violence In China Brings A Culture Of Secrecy to Light

Domestic violence is often referred to as the secret or silent crime because its victims are frequently too afraid to go to the police for a number of reasons. Part of the cycle of abuse starts before the first blow is landed, as the abuser works to first isolate and then to psychologically break down the victim. By the time the abuse moves into the physical aspect, the victim is convinced that they are without a friend or safety net and worse, that they fully deserve everything that is happening to them.

Such is the case of Kim Lee, being heralded as the face of domestic violence in China, a culture that not only looks past the abuse but actually expects it to happen. Kim met the man that she would first marry and then flee from in 1999 when she was still a teacher from Miami, Florida. She would first start working for Li Yang, described as a Chinese entrepreneur who's language mastery system had made him into something of a celebrity, helping him with his business. A few years after the couple's first child, a daughter, was born, they were married in a ceremony in Las Vegas. Not long after they were wed, Li Yang would attack his wife for the first time and while he did so a few other times during the marriage, one vicious attack during her second pregnancy stood out.

Kim Lee finally managed to get out when her husband pounded her head into the ground in front of their children but she is facing a major battle to divorce him. His business and celebrity status are suffering because she is blogging about the abuse, posting pictures that happened on that fateful night.

There are really no official numbers on domestic violence in China because the practice is accepted and widely condoned. Estimates suggest that it is possibly one in every four women with the numbers in rural areas of China as high as two in three. In the United States, one in every four women will deal with some type of abuse from a loved one during her lifetime. Over a million women are physically abused. While domestic violence can happen to anyone, it is overwhelmingly a crime that affects women with 85% of the victims being female. And, worldwide, between 40 and 70% of all female murder victims are thought to have been killed by an intimate partner or family member.


Street Talk

If you are a parent, you should send your daughters to martial art classes from the beginning of their school life. It is very sad to know that the domestic violence is still alive in this modern world.

Reply
  about 9 years ago

Martial arts training is not effective against domestic violence, especially when there is more psychological abuse rather than physical. In fact, a young woman, a black belt to be exact, was just killed by her spouse. Her training failed her on many levels because of the mental abuse.

Reply
  about 9 years ago

If anyone has gone to a martial art class, he knows that the martial art is much more about mental strength rather than physical strength. It may be just a single case when a black belt holder is killed by her husband. Well, I heard that attack is the best form of defense.

  
  about 9 years ago

I understand what you are trying to say, however, psychological abuse trumps mental strength, even in highly trained people. That is how the abuser manages to take control- they break their victims down.

  
  about 9 years ago

The other thing about "fighting back"... it only makes it worse and they get more angry and hurt you way worse. The picture of that lady up there... is NOTHING compared to what happened to me when I tried to run away then was caught and fought back. I understand completely what you are trying to say. I have said stuff like that before it happened to me as well...

Reply
  about 9 years ago

We are such a violent creature. There is no reason for physical violence.

Reply
  about 9 years ago

SO SAD THIS THINGS STILL HAPPEN. We were supposed to be civilized by now. I wish the best for those who are abused.

Reply
  about 9 years ago
Barbara9  

thanks for a wonderful article.

Reply
  about 9 years ago

Whether you are black or white, young or old, rich or poor, you know someone who is affected by domestic violence, even if it is the person you see in your mirror every night. Don't be afraid to reach out to a victim, don't be afraid to reach out to those who are trying to help you. Love should never hurt.

Reply
  about 9 years ago
Kyle  

Most definitely Amie, people tend to not want to reach out for help but if they could only understand how many people will go out of their way to help them perhaps this issue could be somewhat resolve. The isolated feeling probably detracts from this and that is unfortunate. Nobody should be scared of the person they are with and no women should have to go through this.

Reply
  about 9 years ago

The very first time I ever witnessed abuse was in 9th grade. My friends boyfriend was pushing her around the hallways at school. The next day she came to school with a fat, busted up lip and a missing tooth. Her excuse to everyone was that she caught a frisbee in the mouth... IN 9TH GRADE!

Reply
  about 9 years ago

Amie, Good article! Thanks. Just realized that the response I was typing is content that merits an article in and of itself -- and recognized it'd help more people if they found it in a search engine with a title and article. So I will turn it into one! blessings, Cynthia

Reply
  about 9 years ago

If you need some frightening statistics for your article, let me know.

Reply
  about 9 years ago

Thanks. I'll be writing from personal experience. Not sure that statistics would enable me to keep writing:-)

  
  about 9 years ago
CurtisJ75  

It is a shame to know the statistics can be so high with domestic violence - which brings up an interesting point - ever wonder how valid blaming an abusive childhood is for the excuses the mostly-male murderers and assault perpetrators use to avoid prison or what not?? Well women have been abused since forever, but they aren't out in numbers killing people like the males of this society are. It makes you wonder how valid that whole "blame it on childhood' therapy really is.

Reply
  about 9 years ago

I don't buy the whole blame the childhood thing and I hold a degree in psychology. I also think it is really a disgusting thing that many of the women who finally manage to fight back kill their abuser and then get sent to jail. Statistically, 85% of all domestic violence victims are women.

Reply
  about 9 years ago

Yes but actually teaching that fact in school might help people realize it's okay to leave...

  
  about 9 years ago
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